From:
darkangel5@REMOVETHISBITbtinternet.com
In case you thought I'd forgotten...
HO DARE !
...bees welcomin yo damn self to da home o' St. Niggolas ... NIGGER CLAUS !
... dont be eatin no yellow snow wiles ya here !
Hello chilluns, set yoself down and lets me be tellin yaz da tale of how
Old Saint Niggolas become Nigger Claus.
Used ta be, way back when ... Crimmus only be fo whitey. Lil black
chilluns be wakin up ta find nuttin but piles o' shit unda dey Crimmus
tree while whitey cross town be gettin all da good stuff.
Well in dis little town way up nort, dey be dis black chop shop owner by
da name o' Niggolas. Now like any black man, Niggolas he liked his
whiskey. One night, while he wuz staggerin home from da local saloon wif
a steamin hot bucket o' fried chicken wif all da fixins undah his arm
old Niggolas be detained by da pigs and befoe nights end died from
internal injuries he sustained when they shoved a billy club up his
hairy black ass fo what da Reverend Al Sharpton said wuz "no apparent
reason."
Instantly da towns black clergy called a special meetin' and wif da help
of da Reverend Jesse Jackass dey canonized old Niggolas and henceforth
"Saint" Niggolas came ta be.
Now chilluns, yaz wud think dat da story wud end wit dat but no fuckin
way. Be sittin yo ass down cuz deys mo. Ya seez, what I didn't mention
was dat ol' Niggolas was stereotypically hung like a moose and
consequently was also da pappy of most of da towns lil black chilluns.
Crimmus aftah Crimmus it pissed him off dat he wud hafta wait til
Crimmus NITE, afta whitey had gone ta bed ta go steal presents fo his
own chillun. Dats why, in some black neighborhoods till dis very day
Crimmus am STILL celebrated on da twenty SIXT o' Decembah.
Well, aftah goin ta his reward Saint Niggolas saw a way to right this
terrible wrong. So ever since then, Saint Nig as "Nigger Claus" can be
found looting department stores and stealin presents outta whiteys trunk
in shopping mall parking lots all over the world so dat on Crimmus eve
he can load up his flashy red Eldorado convertible and be deliverin' em
to all da po' black chilluns.
On da way he stops at all the white folks houses(except fo da Jews ...
even Nigger Claus has SOME standards)and steals all their presents, eats
their cookies, raids their liquor cabinets and rapes their women. Den
it's off to da ghetto to bring smiles ta da faces of all da lil black
chilluns.
So next Crimmus eve chilluns, be lookin up inta da sky round midnite.
And if ya sees a nappy headed, jolly old fat man, stinkin of booze and
dressed in red standin up behind da wheel of a red ghetto sled Cadillac
pulled by a team of angry pit bulls dat ain't no Santa ... Dat am
"NIGGER CLAUS" !!!
Merry Crimmus ! Happy Kwanzaa ! God bless us ... EVERYONE !!!
Be proud of your heritage.
--
Best Wishes
Simon (Dark Angel)
http://www.realmofhorror.co.uk
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